Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Finale

August 24, 2008

Well I think it’s time to bring this experiment to a close.  The next semester of school starts very soon, and I’m already getting overloaded with the amount of work needed to start things off on the right foot.  While there are still more Alaska stories to tell they’ll have to be in person, at a later time.

Part of the work I’m involved with now is applying for summer jobs.  To do so I reference previous experiences and skills I’ve gained, and of course Alaska is top of the list.  And although I would talk about how positive it was and how much I learned regardless, it was positive and I did learn a lot.

It’s a cliche by this point, but law school does not teach you how to be a lawyer.  It certainly helps, but there are facets to the practice that are simply not covered in school, at least in the first year.  The human element is large, whether it’s explaining to a client why they’re screwed, or talking to another attorney about the logistics of a court appearance.  Even if there was a class on real world practice, immersion is the best teacher.  I am certain the lessons I learned at the firm I worked in this summer will be with me my entire career.

Secondly, I practiced and refined my writing.  Here’s the dirty little secret about law: A good writer will make a good lawyer regardless of their legal “skills”, while someone who can read a case and zero in on the key elements, but can’t communicate them, will always falter.  Communication in general, and writing in particular, is so important in the legal world that I would rather employ someone who received an A in legal writing and C in every other class than the reverse.  Ironically perhaps, being skilled in legal writing also helps for your final exams.

Alaska wasn’t all roses.  The class was interesting, if probably near-worthless to whatever focus I decide to do(although you never know).  Anchorage is still kind of a dump, although picks up considerably with access to a car.  There were trips that didn’t turn out great, and trips that I wished I could have taken.  But it was seven weeks in a foreign state; it’s not supposed to be perfect.  Even with the occasional snag, the experience was positive and will continue to pay dividends.  Although I missed my friends and loved ones, career-wise I don’t think I could have had a better summer.  Also Alaska’s gorgeous.  Everyone should visit, though perhaps not live there for a couple of months.

This blog was an interesting experiment.  How consistent would my writing be?  Answer: not very.  But it was good practice for that oh-so critical skill.  Will I try another one?  Maybe…I’m sure year two is worth some ink down the line.  But the idea of taking on another project right now gives me chills.  However if I do so, I will post the URL right here.  Consider it the post script.  Otherwise, this is it for me for a while.  Thanks to all you loyal reader, and best of luck.

-Noah

Senses on Full

August 14, 2008

Writing about the trek at the Visitor’s Center reminded me of something that has caught my attention before.  Whenever I’ve engaged in some strenuous activity, my senses seem enhanced for a while.  I don’t mean like Wolverine, hearing a fly buzzing three miles away, but it is noticeable.  For example, there was a gym next to the dorms that I would visit a couple times a week.  If I had a good session, I would come back to the kitchen and everything would smell more distinct.  Any unwashed dishes would smell much more foul, and likewise anything tasty in the fridge would be even more appealing.

How does this relate to the hike in Denali?  As I said, I got completely exhausted and went to the center to rest and listen to music.  Sure enough, the whole music listening experience was enhanced.  I was hearing instrumental riffs and trills that I had simply never picked up on before; it was like listening to the director’s cut of a song.  Now I would have thought it had something to do with the exhaustion thing, being close to sleep making your brain act funny or whatever, but for the increased sense after any kind of major exertion.  The human body is very interesting, no?  Has anyone else experienced something similar?

Denali: Part 3

August 12, 2008

Day 2 (cont.): When we last left off, our group had just finished a pretty, if lengthy, trip through the backcountry of Denali National Park.  After five hours on the bus, we arrived at our final destination, and the furthest destinations possible for all park goers.  Wonder Lake, notorious not just for a wondrous lake, but for literally being under the shadow of gigantic Mount McKinley.

We landed, ate our granola bars, unpacked our gear, and looked for a campsite to set up.  The weather was nice, sunny and breezy.  Some of our best weather of the trip, a fact that was rapidly approaching peak irony.

Our search for a campsite was more arduous than it should have been at a site that, frankly, few people overnight at.  The camping zone was essentially a circle, with outlets in the circle leading to camping areas, food storage lockers, and the like.  The first problem was the initial outlets that were full up with previous campers.  No issue really, we’d just keep going around until we found an area.  We walked for half a mile before realizing we had (realistically) gone way too far.  A minor snag.

The second problem was that our crap was heavy.  The wood, the bags, the backpacks; stuff adds up.  Trekking under the sun, after a long bus ride, after getting far too little rest was very draining.  Finally I called it, told two folk to leave their stuff with me so they could find the right campground.  We had clearly made a mistake somewhere.  Another minor snag.

But all this was foundation for the real problem with Wonder Lake, which was this:  it was the goddamn mother lode of mosquitoes.  Swarms and clouds surrounded us.  Well me and Jules, the other two had gone off searching for vacant pastures.  This problem was major.

I hate mosquitoes, I really do.  I realize that’s not a unique position on this green Earth, but that doesn’t lessen the feeling one iota.  The biting and the itching are no fun of course, but what really grinds my gears is the buzzing around my ears.  There is no sound worse than the shrill twizzzZZZZ of a bug circling you before coming in for a closer look.  I’m certain my own private hell will include choruses of mosquitoes in perma-orbit around my head.  Actually I think hell gets their mosquito supply from Wonder Lake.

So there we were, swatting bugs and looking miserable.  We had these special hats with netting that we put on, but that didn’t stop them from buzzing around you and landing on your face(although the biting was noticeably reduced).  With the bites nearly shut-off, I tried to sit down and zen away their existence.  Mixed results.  But soon enough our scouting two came back, said they found a site, we should have taken a left past the bus stop, not a right, etc etc.  We grab the stuff, which hasn’t gotten lighter in the previous ten minutes and head over there.  It’s a nice enough spot, but priority one is digging out the bug spray and liberally applying it to my hands, face, ears, eyes…sweet, sweet DEET.  I realized then and now that my skin was absorbing far too much toxicity, that my sweat could be used to protect crops and so on but I didn’t care.  It got the job done.

Now for people who may find themselves in a similar spot, there are natural ways to combat bug swarms.  It’s not any of that homeopathic DEET/DDT-free junk they sell at the Wheat Grassery, that stuff won’t do diddly.  Nope, you gotta pray for rain.  A good driving rain will scatter the bugs for a little while.  I look up.  Clear, sunny skies.  I pray real hard but god knows I skirt the atheism/agnosticism border (brought on by mosquito experiences at Jew camp, a fact which I’m sure amuses Someone greatly).  With no monsoon, there is another possibility, and that is starting a real smoky fire.  And lo, we brought wood with us.  And low, on the ground, lots of leaves for getting things nice and smoky.

Except, Wonder Lake bans all fires!  What?  What in the world is the point of camping if you can’t build a raging, dangerous camp fire?  And more importantly, why did I carry all that wood?!!?

Grumbling and slapping, we set up the tents and got to planning.  It was early afternoon, and our final full day in Denali.  The bus was coming early tomorrow, as usual.  Jules and Kiki were set on exploring the Wonder Lake area, whereas I wanted to get the hell out of there.  Nick wanted to explore some of the trails back at the Visitor’s Center, so again we split up to go hiking in different spots.  Nick and I grabbed our gear and went to the bus area to wait.  Along the way we stopped by the lake, and spoke with a very nice elderly couple from Denmark.  The woman was sweet, occasionally struggling to find a particular word in English (both of their English was excellent, whereas my Danish was too rusty to even try).  As usual, it’s great fun to talk to people from other countries.  Here’s a pic of Wonder Lake(eleventy trillion mosquitoes not pictured):

The bus arrived, a touring special.  We begged a ride on, which was no real problem.  Unfortunately, the bus driver/tour guide was terrible.  We had been spoiled by Dick apparently.  Besides stopping regularly to look at…things, he told some awful stories.  My favorite was how Mt. McKinley got its name, which was at least a 20 minute tale that ended with some explorer trying to stick it to some silver-standard people by naming it after the governor of Ohio at the time, who supported the gold standard.  Riveting stuff I know, but the length of time it took you to read that sentence is exactly as long as that story should have been.  When we arrived at the center we hightailed it out of there.

The sky was beginning to cloud up at this point, but the weather looked fine for some light hikes, which the area purported to provide.  There were two routes from center: up or down.  Flipping a coin in my head, I nominated down for the initial hike.  Ideally we’d get to a good spot, then go to the hills, then take a bus back in time for dinner.

Two problems hit us on the way down: the trail deteriorated and it started to drizzle.  The drizzle wasn’t too bad, but it did make things chilly.  I got a nasty cold weeks ago after a long hike in the rain, and wasn’t looking to repeat it(especially with the final exam so close).  But more pressing was the trail turning narrow and muddy, and on occasion, being lost altogether.  In addition, the light downhill slope was getting more and more steep.  Now that wasn’t too bad for the way down, but it promised tough times on the way back.

However, it was beautiful.  The foggy hills, the flowers and brush, the crisp air; all painted a rugged and vitalizing picture.  Yeah it was chilly and steep, but it was fundamentally fun.  I was having fun.

After a while, we got to a cliff edge and decided to turn around.  We could have gone further, but the weather was getting wrose and we still wanted to try the aerial view before we had to be on the bus.   I realize now this shot was somewhat predictive:

So we headed up.  As expected, the hills were grueling.  To keep costs low, I had decided against buying new, water-resistant, light hiking pants.  However, as the rain got heavier so did my pants, making the climb even more arduous.  Then a strange thing happened: I became exhausted.  And I don’t mean I gradually got more tired.  I mean that one second I was moving along, and the next my tank was squarely on “E”.  It was an odd feeling, one I had never experienced before.  Of course I had been out of energy in my life, but generally you feel it coming.  This was an instantaneous drop-off, and it literally took my breath away.

My guess is it was some combination of working hard on the hill, the dropping temperatures, and diminished internal resources from low sleep/low food.  Regardless, things were getting really tough for me.  I slowly moved up the hill, far slower than I had before, which concerned Nick.  I told him I wasn’t going to pass out, which was true, but that he should keep moving.  I slowly moved upward, stopping to rest when needed, which was often.  This let my pants accumulate more water, which wasn’t helping.

But I made it to the top where Nick was waiting.  He asked me if I wanted to try to tackle the upper path.  The rain was coming down fairly hard at this point, but I told him if I had some time to rest, I would give it a shot.  We sat down for ten minutes, munching on granola and dried fruit.  And then we moved on.

The best part of the upper half was trying to find the trail.  We found some scratched out portions of grass and took them, but these literally led to mountainous drop-offs.  Were the sheep trying to kill us off?  We did find the correct path and moved on, but I could tell that break had not fully restored me.  I kept at it, but when the path took a noticeably sharp uptick, I told Nick I had to head back.  To his credit, he supported this decision.  Before heading back, I took a pic of Nick in the still-worsening rain.  He looks exactly how we both felt:

Frodo, you must destroy the One Ring!

So I headed back to the heated Visitor’s Center, where I pulled out some music, snacked, and rested.  Not too long after, Nick showed up, explaining the fog had made any more climbing too treacherous.  I supported his decision.  And an hour later, we sneaked onto a bus headed back to Wonder Lake.  The bus ride was far more interesting than the way down.  We spotted a wolf, which is very rare in the park:

Near the end our bus rounded a corner and startled a moose.  We were told most animals that hang out by the road are used to vehicles and don’t think it a big deal, especially since the animals aren’t disturbed.  But for some reason this moose was skittish.  Its response?  Jumping in the nearest lake.  I couldn’t stop laughing.

Otherwise, another uneventful bus ride.  These were becoming second nature.  We warmed up and snacked, looking forward to a “real” dinner back at the campsite.  Our timing was excellent, as we got back at about the same time Kiki and Jules had; in fact the water for our bags o’ food was already on the boil.  We shared stories and pictures and got to eating.  Not bad, especially when you’re as hungry as we were, but it had nothing on the real stuff.

Getting late and cool and dark(WHY NO FIRES??? C’MON!), our last activity was all of us crawling into a tent to play some Euchre.  I’m not going to say who my partner was, but she has a ways to go still on her Euchre development.  But it was fun and cozy and a nice way to end our final evening at Denali.  We said our goodnights, promised to have them over next time, and crawled into our respective sleeping bags.  The mosquitoes were blessedly absent.

Day 3: Again we wake up far too early.  Once again packing up the tents and eating little to nothing, we head to the bus area with our stuff.  There’s an area in the food lockers for people to leave things for the next group, so we drop off some bags of food and the wood(ha!).  It was a much lighter trek without it.  The bus comes right on time, so we load up with a few other groups and head out.

This trip goes much faster than the way up, mostly because there aren’t many animals out and a lot of sites aren’t open.  We make the requisite bathroom/stretch breaks, and catch shut-eye when possible.  We chat, and it’s good.  Our last shot was a pair of moose off to the side; together, as if waving goodbye to the best group ever:

And upon arriving at the main center and getting into the car, our trip drew to a close.  There was some unpleasantness with the bugs and the weather, it was overall a great time.  The cost meant this was not going to be a regular thing, but the opportunity was too rare not to take full advantage of.  I was, and am, glad I got to go to one of the most beautiful places in North America.  If any of you have the chance, I wholeheartedly recommend it.  We drove back to our final weeks of work and school.  And a very looming final exam.

Bonus: When we got back, no ticket on the car!  Eat it Denali!

Denali: Part 2

August 5, 2008

Day 1(cont.):

After our Savage River bear run-in, we finished our hike with no more issue.  We enjoyed the scenery and gave a good story to hikers we met on the way back.  After returning to the trail head, we packed up and headed towards the campsite.  However, on the way back a dry riverbed caught our eye.  It was practically begging to be hiked in.  Feeling adventurous, we pulled over on the side of the road and jumped in.

The dry riverbed was exactly that, a channel where water once flowed.  It was mostly rocks, with a little scrub poking through.  A remarkably wide area; we could have had 8-10 people walking side by side in it without touching bank.  As such, our group scattered a bit.  Some went on to forge ahead, others stayed behind to examine tracks or cool rocks or spiders or whatever.

Eventually we reached the end of the “river”.  Head back or push forward?  Silly question.  We climbed out of the bed and slogged on.  Loosely, we were following moose track/moose scat, but we were basically moving in wherever piqued our interest.  Along the way I spotted this happy critter:

I couldn’t get close enough to pet it, but I got much, much closer than I could have if it was a city rabbit.  This is par for course of animals in Denali.  With the one notable exception I’ll mention later, the animals here were not afraid of humans.  The ethos of the park was a light touch, and generally the visitors held to that standard.  Great for photographers!

We bushwhacked for a while until coming upon an actual flowing river.  The river wasn’t wide per se, but it required some skill to cross.  Our man Jules, showing raw bravado, found a narrowish point, leaped over and egged us to join him.  Jules masterfully avoided mentioning how soggy his ankles had become, but their dampness was not lost on the rest of us.  We three forged ahead to find an easier crossing point.  We reached a spot that I could leap, and Nick could pole vault over, but that Kiki felt stranded.  After making said leap, we decided to split up, with Kiki and I moving around the undergrowth, and Nick and Jules checking the raised portion ahead.

What actually happened was that Kiki and I got lost, and in this brush-like flora too.  Now I was grateful to actually set foot in this stuff, because up close it’s far different than it appears from a car or bus.  Driving past, it looks like Denali is covered in this light, verdant, meadow-ish growth; something that would be easy to carouse or frolic in.  It’s very inviting.  But the actual stuff is knee to waist high, relatively tough to penetrate or trample, and decidedly anti-gallivant.  It quashed similar temptations for the rest of the trip.

Kiki and I did find our way back to our starting point, and Jules and Nick soon caught up.  Tired and sweaty and river-wet, we drove back to the main campground.  To set up camp!  Right now I should say I am not a “camper-guy”.  Clearly I have no animosity to camping, but my knowledge of the craft is minimal at best.  All that bear research from the last post?  Useful, but I probably should have been looking up how to pitch a tent or start a fire.  Both of these things were done, but I was standing there like a lump the whole time.  In the case of the former that was literally true: we had trouble setting up the second tent so my job was to stand(kneel) in the middle to demonstrate what the tent looks like fully erected.  Look mommy, I’m helping!

But we succeeded, in both tent and fire.  The fire was very welcome, as the night started to turn chill.  We figured out the little propane burner and began to boil water for the pouch meals.  The vegetarian ones were really tasty, but the “exotic” bags, like honey-mustard chicken or scalloped potatoes were completely awful.  But no one expects fine cuisine on camping trips, right?

After dinner, sitting around the crackling fire, we pulled out our S’Mores kit.  Our kit was standard, except you had the choice of Hershey’s choclate or Reese’s PB Cups nestled in the graham crackers.  P.S. wow!  Those Reese’s are the wave of the future.  Highly recommended.  Here’s a pic of Kiki and Jules doing their marshmallow thing:

I know why Jules keeps eying those Reese’s.

After S’Mores fun and beers drinking, we tucked in for the evening.  Our timing was great, as the night was getting colder still and rain was starting to trickle down.  We took care of our business and shimmied into our sleep wear and got into our respective tents and sleeping bags.  My bed is nicer, but there is something cozy about a sleeping bag when the tent is going “pitter-patter” against the falling rain.  I quickly fell asleep.

Day 2(kinda):

I woke up needing to pee.  Badly.  Did I, did I forget to pee last night after all those beers?  I couldn’t remember.  What I did know was that a: I wanted to visit the latrine; b: it was goddamn freezing outside; c: it was goddamn raining outside; d: it was warm in the sleeping bag; and e: my tentmate’s head was directly in front of the tent exit.  I really didn’t want to get up, but I really wanted to go.  Could I will the urine away, maybe some kind of teleport action?  I tried really hard, but no luck.  Arggh!  What time was it?  We needed to be up at some ungodly hour to catch our bus to the next campground.  Tossing and turning I tried to go back to sleep, conceding the inevitable kidney damage.   But No Luck.  Resigned, I got up and in doing so, noticed a second exit to the tent, on my end.  I unzipped it quickly and scurried out.

IT WAS COLD.  My body “sensed” it was cold out from the inside of the sleeping bag and tent, but being faced with it…man.  I slipped on my sandals and did some kind of crouching shuffle-walk to the latrine, 20 feet away.  I looked at my watch: 3AM!  Great start to the day!  I got to the porta-potty and began to feel some release.  It hurt a little, I had to go so bad.  And um, sorry to the next person, it was so cold my hand was really shivering.

Having finished, I hobbled back to the tent and got into as much warm space as I could scrounge.  Was it even worth sleeping for a mere two hours longer?  Yes.

Day 2:

We slowly get up at five, or somewhere near it.  We have about an hour to strike the set, eat breakfast, and get over to a new area to catch the bus taking us to Wonder Lake.  The bus trip would take five hours, and along the way much scenery and wildlife was promised.  No one has any problem getting up, but we’re all moving slowly.  For obvious reasons.

The packing proceeded steadily, if slowly.  I made some instant oatmeal, a pale breakfast indeed compared to steel-cut heaven.  But I threw in some dried pineapple and made it palatable.  Barely.  After slight fuel, we loaded up the car and headed to the station.  Here our communal lack of experience caught up, when we discover that our car can’t actually park in the lot overnight like we planned.  Apparently the right move is to park at a special lot, and take a shuttle to the bus depot.  We debated heading back for the time expenditure of the shuttle vs. the risk of a tow vs. the cost of a ticket.  We spoke to some officials in the bus building, and they tell us at worst our penalty will be a ticket “but for parking over a single night, you’re probably fine”.  We take this tepid approval as gospel and pray the car is in the same place when we come back the next day.  We unload our stuff, and lug some very heavy wood over to the pickup station, looking forward to the fire we’d build at Wonder Lake.  The camper bus arrived, and we and other intrepid campers pile on our stuff and selves.

There are two bus systems in Denali.  One is the camper-style, with space for gear.  The other is the tour-style, which made frequent stops and had running commentary.  Our driver, Dick, was a salty guy who laughingly told us we would not be stopping every time some moose wandered around a field.  Dick told us he’d be keeping chatter to a minimum, and stopping only for “bears or better”.  Considering how worn-down the entire bus looked that early in the morning, his plan was duly appreciated.

I tried to grab shuteye when possible, but these backcountry roads were not regularly visited by the department of urban development, if you know what I’m saying.  I’d get maybe 10-15 minutes, when a large pothole would jar me awake.  The bus had some light conversation and light sleepers, and eventually I gave up and talked to folk.  We made a couple of stops at campgrounds to pick up/drop off people, but things were uneventful until we noticed a couple of buses stopped on the road.  Why?

“Bear!  Bear on the road!”  Anyone dozing woke up and sure enough

Dick was explicit on not dangling bodies, arms, heads outside the bus to get a better shot.  We didn’t really need to.

The only other animal of note we saw on this leg was a caribou.  Not a fancy animal, but I hadn’t seen one yet :)

Our last stop before the final 45 minute push was a very nice visitor’s center.  This center was the last stop for most of the non-camper people, and as such, was fairly busy even when we arrived.  The center faced out to the stunning Polychrome Mountains.  Unfortunately I couldn’t get a good picture.  But imagine a row of epic mountains painted in reds and greens and blues, and you’ll get the idea.

After our last break, we spent a little more time on the bus.  Awake and excited, we finally arrived at Wonder Lake.  Unfortunately things took a downturn there, for this finale of Denali ‘08.  But that will have to wait until next time.

Denali: Part 1

July 25, 2008

“The Big One”, Denali was impressive throughout.  A quick rundown:

Pre:  Camping is complicated, at least the first time.  Scrambling for sleeping bags, tents, food, shoes(I think we know why these were important), and so on.  Some items we could borrow and some had to be bought.  Then there was the reservation process itself, which was relatively complicated.  When to leave, when to head back, what to do when we got there; Planning was required every step of the way.  It should get easier the next time, especially when you buy permanent gear, but for our initial foray…  Worse, Denali’s distance from civilization doesn’t allow much modification once you’re on the road.  But we worked at it and got things mostly on target.  We hoped.

Day 1:

We left at an ungodly 6 AM away from Anchorage.  The drive itself took ~5 hours, which went by pretty quickly.  We all took turns playing DJ with Ipods, talking about gender, family, sex, money, and the like.  Good stuff.

We passed through powerful scenery and inclement weather to arrive at the main entrance.  While the opening gate was welcoming, barriers awaited.  Unlike many parks, Denali will let you drive your car in, but they won’t let you take it through the entire grounds, which of course required more prep.  Our first order of business was to register our campsite and eat.  We go to the tourist building and I have a hideously bland burger.  The rest of the group get similarly weak sauce, and our adventure becomes badly in need of upgrading.  We decide to take the public road to its limit and hike the only trail in Denali, Savage River.  Here’s an aerial view of how the main road looks at the guard house protecting the rest of the park:

Pretty place, no?

Speaking of aerial view, Savage River was a pleasant trial, but a trifle soft.   So Nick and I went off-trail a quarter of the way through, climbing hills and outcroppings and getting fun views like the above.  And this:

This was fun for a while, but trouble was apaw.  Nick and I lingered on a hill, so that the rest of the group continued along.  After coming down and getting back on the path, we passed a ranger walking towards the trail head.  We exchanged our hellos and continued on, when a second later she yelled “Bear!  Bear on the trail!”.  Nick and I turned, and sure enough we saw a bear on the trail, not ninety seconds where we were climbing before.

Let’s back up a second.  Bears were a prominent part of my Denali research.  I, to my knowledge, have no bear phobias.  Yet one has to respect in Denali that bears are prevalent.  And, theoretically at least, bears are a genuine threat to life.  More than something like exposure or, I dunno, syphilis. Now the fact that you can be killed doing something should not bar you from the activity.  I regularly get into airplanes and drive cars.  I’ve bungee jumped, and while I had a primal fear jumping off the crane, I would argue a little threat to life and limb once in a while makes life colorful.  In fact, it was the expense of the Denali trip that turned me off somewhat, rather than the copious bears running around the park, which upon typing it I realize is some weird value system.

But for all that “makes life worth living” talk, I have a healthy respect for lethal activities.  I might appreciate the rush of adrenaline, or getting from A to B, but that hardly crosses into suicidal.  As such, we did plenty of bear research before coming to Denali.  Bears, we learned, have powerful noses, and are in general leery of humans.  They’re indirectly dangerous if they smell food, and they’re directly dangerous if you get in the way of their cubs or if you startle them.  Don’t trap them in a corner either, but that seemed unlikely in 9,400 square miles of preserve.  The direct dangers were easy (make lots of noise, don’t pet the adorable cubs!!!), but the food bit required preparation.  Mainly it meant storing all food and wrappers inside bear canisters, and keeping nothing on you when you’re wandering around the woods.  Easy enough, although we relaxed these standards somewhat near the end of the trip.

So back to this bear.  This bear became two as its companion came lumbering down to join it.  Nick swore they followed me down the mountain, but it’s hard to say.  Being a good Denali guest I didn’t have food on me, but maybe I was rank enough to summon bears.  I hope not, that would wreak havoc on my game.  Regardless, we were confronted by two bears on the trail, yay fifty yards away from us.  The park service recommends 250 yards, for what it’s worth.

The ranger was waving her arms and yelling like mad, to get their attention and drive them off.  She suggested we do the same.  We did so.  Nick, bless his heart, was uncomfortable with the pair o’bear, and turned around and got ready to run off.  The ranger turned and screamed “DO NOT RUN”.  She was right of course, bears are attracted to running people.  We went back to yelling and arm waving, trying to sound tough and look large.  I took a quick break to snap a few photos.

Was I scared?  I don’t think I was was scared per se.  The best way to describe how I felt was “high alert”.  My senses were trained on those grizzly bastards; I was focused.  Fear wasn’t part of things, just being in the moment.  There was a trill in my tummy, but if I didn’t feel safe exactly, I didn’t feel in mortal danger.  It’s hard to describe.

The shouting/arm waving thing was going fine.  The bears had sniffed around, but decided to about face and head back towards the trail head.  I was sure a bus load of tourists was about to get a good show.  Things were going along swimingly until another group of hikers came around the bend.

This was a situation.  The bears noticed the other people, and the other people, those bastards, began to walk towards the bears.  The ranger screamed “DO NOT WALK TOWARDS THE BEARS” and they listened.  Mostly.  But still, the bears were not happy to be confined so.  They turned back towards us and took a few steps closer, their first.  At each step that “high alert” feeling turned into “higher alert”.  Running was a terrible idea.  Right?

Well we kept waving and shouting and eventually the bears decided they had had enough.  Jumping into the cold Savage River they went to the other side and climed a big hill yonder.  Here’s a shot of them deciding to take a plunge:

You can just make out the other group in the background.

The rest of the walk was uneventful (but to be fair, where else is there to go after that?).

Which is not to say the day was over, but that will have to wait until later.  I have a final I need to study for.

:(

The final stretch

July 18, 2008

And the second to last week comes to a close. Remaining:

*Two days of class
*Three days of work
*A final exam
*An end-of-term dinner, sponsored by SeattleU
*Packing(frown)
*And last but certainly not least, this weekend’s trip to Denali National Park.

According to the Denali National Park Visitor’s Board, Denali National Park is the best thing ever. Six hours away from Anchorage in pristine wilderness, a weekend trip is almost criminally short. But what can you do? We bought lots of freeze-dried food today to stick into bear canisters. I have packing(frown) to do tonight. And tomorrow at 6AM, we head out! Pictures forthcoming.

-Noah

P.S. On advice of counsel, I will not be hiking in the backcountry with my trademark “Bacon-and-Honey Delight” sandwiches.

The morning ritual

July 13, 2008

There are people out there, most likely some type of automaton, who are colloquially referred to as “morning people”.  These genteel souls go to sleep early, wake up early (no doubt having spent slumber dreaming of all the exciting things that will be accomplished the next day!!!) and in general harnessing life to the fullest.  These good people are not just active in the morning, they penetrate the morning, forcing the AM to do their noble bidding.

I am not a morning person.  I wake up slooooooow.  This is well documented.  My most likely move when I wake up is to fall back asleep, followed very closely by a trip to the bathroom, then back to sleep.  If I do manage to get up and stay up, most likely due to a feminine influence, I’m still effectively comatose.  I shuffle around, mumble; all those clever quips that pepper the afternoon and evening are buoyed by the extraordinary dullery of first part of the day.  Mentally I’m way below what any medical person would call “conscious”.   Physically there’s something similar.  I am, among other things, not in the least bit hungry out of bed.  My body is still in hibernation mode, for good or ill.  I may be thirsty, but put a piece of toast in front of me and I’d have a lot of trouble choking it down.  When my brain has woken up my body follows, although it might be the other way around.  The tricky part is getting that process started.

I generally do the bathroom/drink of water bit, and if I remember to, splash some water on my face and/or stretch.  This is a good eye opener if i remember to do it, but memory is a mental process, and again not my specialty straight out of bed.  It’s kind of a Catch-22, which is a concept I can utilize correctly because I’m writing this post at 11:30 at night.

Anyway, we’ve got this issue where morning is slow time, and I need to get started on the day, but we need a spark.  After said ignition, you gotta fuel up.  Luckily, oh so luckily, there’s cooking to the rescue.  A meal, a specific breakfast that takes the right time to make, so that by cooking it you’re mentally awake, and by the time it’s finished you’re hungry to eat.  The magic meal is that old chestnut oatmeal.  And if you’re curious how to put together this delightful morning ensemble, look no further my friend.  Full details ahead.

Now there are a lot of kinds of oatmeal out there.  Instant and rolled are the two most common to Americans, and they’re not bad in a pinch.  Instant is a little sugary and a little expensive for what you get, but in a pinch…Rolled oats are great to have around for desserts or the occasional granola bar.  But for breakfast, head and shoulders above the best version of oats are Steel-Cut.  So named by the process used to separate the grain from the oat kernel, these oats are the least processed of oat varieties, and consequently the healthiest.  In my opinion they’re also the tastiest, but the trade-off is that they require the most effort.  I believe it is time well spent.

The golden ratio of steel-cut oats is a simple one cup of oats to four cups of liquid.  This is the ratio for the oats to absorb the right amount of liquid, so that they create yummy, gummy texture, as opposed to being a mass or disintegrating.  Less than that amount of liquid goes from uncomfortably chewy to painfully crunchy.  This ratio is a good standby, but keep in mind that each portion of steel-cut is slightly different.  The toasting process(below) can be different, the amount of time absorbing liquid, and the amount of liquid needed for optimal consistency are all variable.  There’s nothing you can really do about the last one except, if needed, add more liquid (sticking to the ratio, it’s not really possible to put in too much right off the bat).  Some may find the lack of consistency a problem for their morning ritual.  I find it endearing.

With the ratio in mind, we first examine how much oatmeal we’ll be making.  That full cup of oats makes way more oatmeal than I can eat.  I generally go with 1/3 cup of oats, with a healthy amount of additions later on.  Sometimes if I’m sensing real hunger in the morning, I’ll go with a half cup, although this is definitely the upper limit of eating for one.  A last point before we get cooking proper: Not all steel-cut oats are precisely the same.  Besides the individual variations in batches mentioned above, brands are subtly different.  The only version I’ve truly disliked is Bob’s Red Mill Steel-Cut Oats.  Bob’s is generally good stuff, but their oats always come out grades below.  Bulk-section steel-cut generally work out well, but my absolute favorite brand is Country Choice Irish Style(Steel-Cut) Oats.  A canister looks like this:

And 1/3 cup of the raw oats looks like this:

You can work with the oats in this state, but I like adding some flavor at this point and toasting them.  It’s a cooking maxim that everything tastes better toasted, and oats are certainly no exception.  To toast the oats, you’re going to need a little butter melted in the bottom of your cooking vessel.  It detracts from the some of the health benefits of this breakfast, but you really don’t need much here.  Your goal is to get the butter liquidus so that you can mix it into the oats to get a more efficient toast going.  Your melted butter will look something like this:

You’ll dump your cup o’ oats into the butter and stir it around, getting as much immersion as possible.  The butter smells alright, but the smell of oats toasting in the morning is both comforting and delicious.  My heat will be at medium-high here.  This portion is the trickiest part of the breakfast, and mistakes do happen.  The overarching goal is for the oats to be browned but not burnt.  Since toasting is optional, you’d be correct to think that under-toasting is superior to over-toasting.  Note however that the flavor spike is pronounced.  The best way to know your toasting is going well is by sight and smell.  Obviously a burned odor is bad news, but it’s not fatal.  A little burn won’t kill you; it most likely means that you haven’t been shuffling the oats enough.  Moving them around in the pan goes a long way towards even toasting.  The smell, sadly, doesn’t transmit.  Hopefully this pic will give you a good approximation of the color you’re looking for:

The next step to the [1/3] cup of oats is [one cup] of boiling water.  When you’re ready for this step, turn the burner down to simmer; ideally the water will be boiling at this point.  Again, the line between toasty and burny is very fine.  There’s nothing wrong with removing the pot of oats entirely from the stove while the water finalizes its boilage.  Water looks like this:

A cup of water looks like this:

Well, approximately.  Boil it in another pot or electric kettle and toss it right on top of the oats.  It will look unappetizing:

Now just cover it with a lid and don’t think about it again for 25 minutes.  During that time the oats will absorb the water and become eatable, and you can spend the time getting further ready for your day.  Perhaps picking out your clothing, or jumping in the shower, or reading from a magazine, or checking your email…whatever’s your fancy.  It’s a great part of the morning.

Once those 25 minutes are up(give or take a few, depending on the batch), your oats will have absorbed the water you’ve given them, taking on the appearance of very moist brown rice:

Astute mathematicians, aka my single reader, will note that we’re still missing 1/3 cup of liquid.  You can use more water, but that’s missing opportunities for flavor.  Of the dairy variety.  With that remaining 1/3, your options are quite varied.  I tried buttermilk for a while, and got a good tang going, but it would always curdle when it hit the hot oats.  Whole milk and half&half are both legitimate options, depending on whoever is winning your flavor v. health battle that day.  I generally use skim milk or 1%, but I’ll put in a touch more than 1/3 of a cup.  This amount varies somewhat, although it’s never more than one half.  I figure too much milk is better than too little, although it does soften the texture of the whole deal.  Depends how gummy you like yours I suppose.

The key before pouring milk is to stir up the oats.  Those little buggers have adhered to the pot at this point; directly adding milk is not going to get the right saturation.  Gently stir the oats before adding the mild and after, to get maximum absorption potential.  Remember, the goal is each oat filled with liquid, but little to none in the bowl itself.  Here’s what stirred-and-immersed oats look like:

And just let it simmer and absorb.  Check on it, and give it a stir if it looks like the milk is pooling up top.  In about 10 minutes, the oatmeal will be fully cooked and ready.  Are you hungry yet?

Those 10 minutes gives us time to get the fixings ready.  Steel-cut oatmeal is perfectly consumable in this form, if a little bland.  But with just a few additions, the oatmeal transforms into something truly special.  To wit:

Scientific fact: everything is better with peanut butter, including peanut butter.  A little cinnamon, maybe some splenda or salt also plays well here.  But this particular morning I’m in a saucy mood, so our PB gets combined with:

Strawberries!  Sweet!

And there you go.  A breakfast to let you start the day off with someting tasty, healthy, and warm in your tummy.  I don’t do it every day, but the ones that begin like this usually go well.  Good morning!

Books Review

July 9, 2008

When I’m not working, studying, fending off amorous moose or playing emulated NES/SNES games, I read for pleasure to while away the time in sunny Alaska.  Here’s my take on the last three I’ve since finished.

Julie and Julia, by Julie Powell

A food-centric memoir, recommended by Brie.  We both thought I would enjoy this one.  I did derive some satisfaction out of reading it but, unusual for me, I found myself liking it less and less when all was said and done.  The reasoning below.

Julie and Julia is about a woman who decides to cook every recipe from Julia Child’s famous Mastering the Art of French Cooking, Vol. 1 within a single year.  The premise was unusual and intriguing.  What would the reader learn about french cooking from this book?  Which recipes would taste great, and which would fall flat?  Are the recipes as butter-and-cream laden as the rumors say?  Why would Ms. Powell attempt such a feat?

That last question is a good one, and having read the entire story, I still don’t know precisely why Julie wanted to tackle Julia, especially under her self-imposed clock.  Maybe we can figure it out.  Julie Powell begins the book as a secretary in a government office.  Having little drive, she finds herself withering on the vine.  In a similar vein, as the book opens Julie finds herself beget(ha!) with fertility issues.  Her marriage is going well enough, but like career and reproduction capabilities, stuck in stasis.  Theoretically, this limbo is a good incentive to kickstart a grand project like Mastering, but on closer inspection the reasoning starts to fall apart.  Although Julie explains why this particular cookbook(nostalgia), the book fails to go into why cooking as a whole is the solution to her woe.  Going back to school, marriage counseling, looking into adoption; these may be effective routes to beating back ennui.  Cooking is fun, but Julie never even implies it as a vehicle to a better life after her year(why why why that deadline?!) is up.  She runs it out as an experiment, a diversion.

But while the foundation is at best arbitrary, the premise does have merit.  It would be stronger still if, for example, the author was soon to attend Le Cordon Bleu, where Ms. Child matriculated, but no matter.  Cooking eminently french recipes, serving them to friends and family…entertaining and educational?  The potential was there.

Sadly the execution is really where the book falls short.  There’s a few reasons for this, but one of the bigbest is simple: You do not care about Julie Powell.  Her “quest”, her domestic issues?  A big fat “whatever” from the reader.  In our defense, these feelings were not self-generation.  Rather, these thoughts were merely a reflection of the author’s own voice.  In the beginning Julie discussed the difficulty of conceiving with her husband. This is not a bad beginning to getting a reader invested. However, any good will generated with the first few chapters are blown away with incessant drinking and swearing and complaining. And complaining, and complaining.  There’s nothing wrong with those things per se, but for engendering sympathy, they are the wrong tack. Who roots for the woman who bitches all day and drinks all night? Clearly she doesn’t root for herself. Why should we get involved?

The second big problem with the premise is that it’s window dressing.  The real story is simply a recounting of Julie’s life that year.  Certainly the cooking project is prominent, but so are the stories about her family and her remarkably insipid friends.  Like attracts like as they say, so there’s no surprise here.  But considering how precariously we care about Julie, Pseudonym X and Y’s plight is strictly wasted ink.  “Oh no, random chica is having trouble finding romance.  Yay, she found romance!  Boo, she’s throwing it away for a new romance.” You can blame the author, my gender, or my soul if you want but I have no interest in shallow people making shallow decisions.

We read about the food, but we’re never drawn into the food.  Julie whines, throws stuff at her husband, cries, starts a blog, continues to work her job, reports she’s remarkably unsympathetic to 9/11, attracts maggots, dishes, and generally behaves like someone you have little interest in knowing.  Well except for her desserts, apparently she’s a champ at pastry making.  Actually the food portions are enjoyable.  Her journey for bones(to extract marrow) or offal or any number of odd recipes and the ingredients they call for are precisely the scenes I wanted to see in the book.  They’re jewels, and like most precious things, far too rare.

One of the oddest passages was the epilogue, where Julie hears that Julia Child has died. Her loyal blog readers clue her in and to their “face” she plays it cool. But moments later, to us, she breaks down and sobs long and hard for the death of Mrs. Child. Although by the finale no one knows what it was, Julia Child was simply a means to an end for Julie. Analogously, it would be like crying when your favorite hammer breaks, or maybe your favorite hammer manufacturer going out of business. No question it’s unfortunate, but great gasping sobs?

There are probably some people out there, not many but some, who read the bible and cry when Jesus goes up on the cross. It would seem to me that such a person would be remarkably sensitive, and their reaction would not seem out of place. A rarity perhaps, but not an oddity. But the issue here is that Julie is not a sensitive person. She doesn’t give a fuck, as she tells her readers many times over. Perhaps it’s a mask, but if so it runs very deep. Certainly deeper than her fledgling authorship skills are able to penetrate. I don’t really care if she’s lying about the death of Julia affecting her, or there are gaps in the story, or her psyche; these are things we are not meant to know. The passage is incongruous, but oddly appropriate to the disconnect of her not caring, yet thinking we will.

Who is the protagonist in Julie and Julia? Who is the villain? Considering it’s an auto-biographical piece, Julie plays all roles. But unlike most autobiographies, where you are simply observing events that have come before, Julie is trying to play on your emotions. She wants the reader to cheer her on. She wants the reader, like her ubiquitous blog readers she quotes so regularly, to be there for her when she stumbles in her pursuits. The primary question all readers will be asking themselves is: Why? Why should we root for this woman? Because she’s trying to cook meals? Because she lives in New York? Because she’s an un-confessed alcoholic? Certainly bad things happen to Julie, but it would be an awfully dull(well, duller) story if nothing bad ever happened to the author. But instead of drama or tension or exaltation when things do go her way, we’re left with blasé. “Problems, yawn.  Solutions, yawn.”  There’s simply no investment. Every time we get close, she actively tries to push the reader back.  Julie reports herself as flighty, and we are helpless not to act the same.

I don’t remember if Julie finished her project on time, nor do I particularly care.  Based on the book I am more interested in looking at Mastering the Art of, and simultaneously less interested in anything further by Ms. Powell.  Her book was a lark, fluff.  That’s fine if it’s what you’re looking for.  I just wish someone had told Ms. Powell.

Predictably Irrational, by Daniel Ariely

MIT Professor Dan Ariely spends 304 pages explaining why are humans are, in his words “whack”.  Each chapter used evidentiary support to back up a particular foible(Irrational) the human race exhibits and falls victim to on a daily basis(Predictable).

The book is, for the most part, brilliant.  Offensively, each chapter explains the oh-so common ways humans are ripe to do things not in their own best interest, and how you can use that information for your own gain.  The book begins abruptly with a comparison to the field of economics, and how the paradigm of people always acting in their own best interest is fundamentally flawed.  While the author does not suggest the reader go out and be more effective at manipulation per se, he dips his toe into using his data to the betterment of all.  More on that in a bit.  Whether you use the information presented for good or evil, it’s a great arrow in your quiver.

Defensively, the information is a mighty shield to the forces of persuasion and vice present in the world.  Knowing how advertisers try to trick you, or how low cognition drops in the throes of desires(gambling, lust, avarice, the other four, etc.)  is incredibly beneficial to your own wallet, maybe your own sanity.  Certainly there are great lessons in the book on how to help raise children in this materialistic society.  The passage on “anchor pricing” alone was worth the price of admission.  The Economist Magazine’s trick to get people to buy online and print subscriptions?  Utterly brilliant.

It’s a good book, but not perfect.  Dan can’t quite maintain the full book’s length, which leads to the later chapters feeling tacked on, pedantic, or whimsical.  He’s clearly at his best on any subject involving money, which luckily is a major percentage of the book.  Dan spends some ink about his quest to use his data to change the policies of a large credit card company.  Dan tells the board that his data will allow them to make (almost) comparable sums of money, but heavily reduce the amount of consumer debt in the country.  A laudable goal, but the board (for some odd reason) does not take him up on his offer.  Ironically, Dan’s optimism seemed irrational, the result predictable.  I can’t say he was wrong to make the attempt, but it seemed more like a foot note than worth the time Dan spent sharing the story with the reader.

Aside from a few middling sections, the book hums along at a brisk pace.  Dan has an easygoing style, and explains the tedious experimentation procedures well.  He’s clearly a teacher, although whether that’s a plus or minus is the call of the reader.  Regardless, for the information he presents on humanity and daily life in America, I would suggest this as required reading.  It’s not 100% gold, but how much do you need before your awareness has been improved dramatically?  You can skip the last few chapters with no great loss, but reading the first 7-10 should be anyone’s top priority.

The United States of Arugula, by David Kamp

Another food book, this one promised gravitas to back up its subject matter.  A very complete tome, at least for the subjects that earned chapters, yet the breezy, optimistic tones of the book kept the reader from feeling overwhelmed.  The reader was overwhelmed, but credit to the author in preventing the reader from feeling that way.

First, I confess I am probably not the target audience.  The book throws around French like it was the underpinnings of all American culinary traditions, or somesuch.  True as that may be, the assumption that the reader knows enough French, or at least French dishes, to not Wiki every other italicized entree was certainly a failure on my end.  I’ve also never read Mastering the Art of, which I’m sure puts me in a minority of the readership.  Names and dates were thrown out like parade candy, and it’s up to the reader to determine how much, or how little, they want to exert themselves during the show.  I chose little.

My take with these kinds of historical works is that they’re written for two reasons.  One is looking back farther than anyone there being alive today.  What were things like during the Revolutionary War?  I have no idea, but luckily you don’t either.  We can both read 1776 and start on equal footing.  The other perspective is the nostaligic one, where the author presumes the reader was around for a good percentage of the book’s subject matter.  Here, the author would revist scenes of childhood memory, ideally with a different, inside perspective than any one person’s experiences from back then.  While of course I know of Emeril Lagasse and Mario Batali, these characters are introduced in chapter 11(of 12).  My guess, although no back cover would dare restrict its buyers in such a way, was that that this book was written for my parents’ generation, i.e. Baby Boomers.  Too much ink was spent on protests and Julia Child to think differently.  Chapters ~1-3 get the 1950-born reader up to speed, and the rest goes to how the key players were acting while you(but not me) were watching, decades ago.  It is interesting, but in my case, in the same interesting way scenery looks when travelling by train.  Good stuff, but far too much goes by too quickly to retain.

Kamp progresses in a steady if languid way.  The egg of locale meets the sperm of a key player, and a new food epoch is born across the country.  It comes off as slightly surreal.  There’s no question that the right person in the right place can alter the course of gastro-history.  But Kamp takes it further, and anecdotally shares with the reader how everyone who was at the epicenter of the new fad went on to gigantic deeds.  “Alice Waters founded Chez Panisse and is now the champion of growing local.  Jeremiah Tower cooked at Chez Panisse for many years and is one of the most famous chefs in America.  Albert Smithson bussed dishes for six months on work-release, and went on to invent China.” And so forth.  One realizes that not everyone involved in a project went on to glory, but odds are if Kamp named you in the book, you were a prominant figure somewhere.  And Kamp throws out a lot of names.  The feeling of being overwhelmed again.

Locations and names and France started running together pretty quickly, but one concept latched onto and threaded throughout the book was the war of convenience.  America had quite the internal struggle going with the convenience’s value: a question of whether ease and bargain beat (eventual) taste and (sometimes) expense.  There were lots of pockets of our history where cooking wives were encouraged, socially, into TV dinners and microwaves, where only a few years before, the stereotype of four simmering pots was the house-wivean ideal.  Although I realize years passed in the turn of a page, it seemed incredibly abrupt, the appeal then stigma of using prepared meals.  The battle may not be over.

There were a few misfires along the way.  Kamp’s style loves to throw around inside cultural references and portmanteau.  He clearly loves being the stylish one, making you work a little harder to get each and every reference dropped.  I don’t hold it against him; I think he laid it on strong, but I appreciate something similar.  Unfortunately in my case, since I was already giving up all those 60s and 70s references anyway, the tonal crests and valleys breezed past too.  Maybe 10% of the book gets lost this way, but since Kamp had the good sense to surround that 10% with very obvious words(in English!), not much content was lost.  It depends on the reader I suppose; I’m sure there are many out there who would find it maddening.  Let’s put it like this: I was not at all surprised to learn David Kamp writes for Rolling Stone.  YMMV.

All in all, I would recommend this book to anyone with food interests.  The history is interesting and instructive, and there is certainly plenty of real human drama present in the stories.  Kamp is clearly passionate about the subject matter, and the fact that that’s clear is a big plus in the column.  As far as my knowledge of the history of food culture in the U.S. is concerned, I feel pretty satisfied.

Moments of zen

July 7, 2008

I probably need new hiking shoes

July 1, 2008